My Personal Experience of Being Bereaved by Suicide

8 Responses

  1. Norma Fraser says:

    Sharon your words are so true Nobody knows the pain. heartache, torture, searching, we go through after a tragic suicide bereavement. We live with this pain everyday when every one else gets on with their life , we put our mask on and let people think we are okay, but we all know we will never be okay. However while we are searching for answers along our path we come into contact with people who are suffering our pain and we become friends with these people sharing our tragic stories and knowing we are not alone sometimes can numb the pain. xxx

  2. Ella says:

    Sharon , I still live with pain after 35 years of loosing my dad, I still know I was not good enough for him to keep him alive xxxx

  3. sharon says:

    Dear Norma, I hope my blog didn’t upset you. I know a lot of people describe wearing a mask to portray to others that they are coping. I am hoping that my blog will also be read by health professionals and front line staff so that they can gain an insight into the difficulties those bereaved by suicide suffer.

    I totally agree that meeting others bereaved by suicide is important as it enables them to realise they are not alone and that there are others that have a true understanding of how they feel. Take care Norma x

  4. sharon says:

    Hi Ella

    Thank you for your post. I’m so sorry to hear about the loss of your dad. I have no doubt that your dad loved you very much. You must never forget that x

  5. Rachel Baker says:

    Dear Sharon
    Thank you so much for writing and making this commentary public. I found that losing my Dad to suicide five years ago left me in a terrible place. Grief is a hugely lonely emotion and even though you are surrounded by family and friends you feel impossibly lonely. You suddenly realise that it us not the loss of the individual that matters but the relationship you had with them. After five years I am only just moving on to deal with the aspect of suicide and feel that I have a long way to go. Your piece helped me a great deal.

    • Sharon says:

      Dear Rachel,
      I am so sorry to hear that you have lost your dad. You are so right working through our grief can feel so isolating and lonely. Nobody can do it for us. I am encouraged that you are coping much better. It just takes time. Thank you for your kind words about what I had written about my own loss. Those words came from my heart, it wasn’t just an academic piece of writing. I am pleased to hear that it has helped in some small way. Take care, Sharon

  6. Alicia says:

    Sharon, thank you for writing this. I lost my Dad 7 years ago, and it is so true how family members grieve differently, and unfortunately it can create rifts in relationships, those you need the most when dealing with something like suicide. After someone making a comment to me at my dads funeral about delivering babies to get away from death, I am now a 1st year student training to be a midwife and hope to be able to use my own experience in a way to optimize the care and compassion that is needed to support people in the midst of any major life change x

    • Sharon says:

      Dear Alicia, I am so sorry to hear that you have lost your dad and the insensitive way some people have responded to you. People who are hurting often hit out at others. Doesn’t make it right, but sometimes it makes it easier to understand and maybe forgive. I have no doubt that your dad would be proud of his daughter becoming a midwife.

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